What the Heck Happened to the Wemmomade?

Wemmomade is what Lola calls lemonade.  Or, CALLED, I guess.  A couple of days ago she said lemonade.  Now, partly I’m so glad she is learning to pronounce her Ls correctly.  When you name your little girl Lorelai, and she can’t pronounce Ls and Rs, you start to feel a little regretful (weegwetfoe?).  It’s always awkward when strangers in public say “and what is your name?” and I have to translate, because “woah-a-why” doesn’t usually ring a bell to most folks. 

She still confuses everyone by calling her brother “Torbin” though.  (Not that they aren’t also confused by Corbin.  “What?  Corbett? Did you make that up?”)  I’m hoping C and K sounds are the next thing to come around.  But then the duck won’t say “twat twat” anymore.  And my sister won’t be able to make her jokes about Old MacDonald having a ‘ho’. 

It’s like a micro level version of the conundrum that is wanting your child to grow up successfully and also wanting them to stay your little baby.  I remember the first time she said the alphabet correctly.  I was so proud and yet so sad.  I really missed the hilarious toddler alphabet that made no sense and contained a few bars of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.  

Here’s the worst part:  I think I’m always going to remember all the cute things she says, but I can hardly recall any of them!  Like, I can’t remember the cute thing she says in the morning long enough to tell it to Brian when he wakes up.  So that I can look back and at least remember a handful here and there, here are some Funny Things Lola Said This Week.

-Lola played in her little kitchen yesterday while I was folding laundry.  She kept calling me “customer number 3.”  Who the heck were the customers that she served before her own mother is what I want to know.  She asked me if I wanted some pie from her wooden pie set, but she couldn’t seem to get the pieces unvelcroed from one another.  So she said “Looks like we’re all out of pie?  You want something else, customer number 3?”  I LOVED this.  In fact, to me it showed very mature problem solving skills.  Give this girl a restaurant!  

-She calls privates “pirates.”  I don’t think she thinks of ACTUAL pirates (though, you never know what kids mis-hear and start to believe.)  But that’s what she calls them.  “Can I wash Torbin’s pirates?”

-When she gets hurt, and I say “I’m sorry honey,”  she says “The floor is sorry.”  Or the door, or the unfortunately misplaced lego, or whatever injured her.

-My parents’ house is Grandma’s House.  Only.  Papa gets the garage.  When my dad left my house the other day, she said “Is he going to Grandma’s house?”  I try to tell her that it’s actually Papa’s house, too.  But she is having none of that.  She thinks it’s Grandma’s house and Grandma is just kind enough to let him stay there, I guess.  So, if you ask me, he better make sure he’s nice to Grandma!

-She enjoys “possitos” (popsicles), I work at the “hossible” (hospital), and I wouldn’t even know how to spell her version of Spaghetti Os.

-Lola doesn’t understand knock-knock jokes yet, but wants to tell them anyway.  Here are some gems.

Knock Knock

          Who’s there?

Lorelai.

          Lorelai who?

Lorelai wearing a dress.

badum bum

also:

Knock Knock

          Who’s there?

Winnie the Pooh.

           Winnie the Pooh who?

Winnie the Pooh loves honey.

Keep practicing kid.

Here is my personal favorite exchange that occurred when she asked ME to tell HER a knock knock joke:

Knock Knock

        Who’s there?

Banana.

         Banana?

Knock Knock.

        Who’s there?

Banana.

        You’re silly momma.

Knock Knock.

        Who’s there?

Orange.

          (stares blankly)

Orange you glad I didn’t say banana!?

        yeah.

and….scene.

(y’all wouldn’t believe the spell check on that post.  And apparently unvelcroed isn’t a word?)

ETA cause I almost forgot this gem:  When she coughs up phlegm, she says “my throat’s coming out.”  I don’t know why I find that so cute.

ETA2:  I LOVE it when she talks about her “mighty powers.”  I know she got this in part from Team Umizoomi, and YES I’m embarrassed that it means she watches too much TV.  But, for instance, yesterday she held the door closed with her foot and told me she had “mighty tiptoe powers.”  She’s always saying stuff like that.  It’s even funnier when she’s not barricading me into my own bedroom.  Also, I love that she does not EVER have just toes, they’re always “tiptoes.”

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2 thoughts on “What the Heck Happened to the Wemmomade?

  1. Pingback: Wednesdays with the Kids #6 « StephiCakes

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