Exposed midriffs no longer a job requirement

I’ve always enjoyed baseball.  Beyond that, I’ve never been much of a sports person.  And then I caught on television one day the coolest thing!  Women’s beach volleyball.  Those women are AWESOME!  I was COMPLETELY sold when I saw this commercial.  Can any girl watch that and not want to be them!?  Not I, I’ll tell you that. 

Sadly, my athletic capabilities fall somewhere just short of mediocre.  Okay, I’m actually even worse.  Daria would kick my ass at volleyball. (Please tell me I’m not the only one who remembers Daria.)  So, sadly, I’ll have to force my daughter to play volleyball.  I’m just kidding about forceing her; why don’t we say “suggest.” Strongly.  Okay, I MAY have considered what would suit a professional volleyball player when picking her name (and almost went with C.J. instead because of it.)

So when my homepage came up this morning mentioning an article about women’s volleyball, I clicked on it right away, slow computer be damned.  And 6 minutes later, when the article finally loaded (y’all have no idea how long it takes me to do stuff on this computer.  You should feel VERY SPECIAL when I bother!) it was this one.  Apparently, for our Olympic athletes, bikinis are no longer required.  I didn’t know they were REQUIRED before, but it made me a little miffed to learn.

Now, don’t get me wrong, if I were one of those women, I would LIVE in a bikini.  Seriously, grocery shopping?  Dining out?  Taking in a movie?  Bikini. Bikini. Bikini.  But I would do it because I WANTED to (have you SEEN these women?)  I’m not sure that basically requiring women to wear a bikini to work* was something that should have lasted as long as it did, meaning right up till now.  I’m sure most of them want to, but REQUIRED?  For a job that doesn’t inherently require it?  That’s kinda sexist.   

But, we’re past that now, and other cultures who couldn’t compete due to ideas about modesty are now more likely to participate.  Yay.  The world needs more kick-ass, Amazonian women for me to look up to.  And since my ONE apprehension about forcing encouraging Lola to be a volleyball player was the shorty short shorts, I now can rest assured that “Shorts of a maximum length of [1.18 inches] above the knee” will be accepted.  And I know she’ll be DYING to be the only one in the Amish-wear.  🙂

*Dear Employer, my coworkers would like to sincerely thank you for not requiring me to wear a bikini to work.  Love, pasty, flabby mother-of-two with copious stretch marks.


6 thoughts on “Exposed midriffs no longer a job requirement

  1. I also learned recently that it was required clothing of the sport, and I was put-off by that fact. I’m glad to know that it’s changed now. Fine, if you want to, but shouldn’t be forced. It’s like female Muslim soccer players not being allowed to wear a hijab when they play. Ridiculous.

    Great post, as usual.

  2. I must confess, I was completely ignorant of volleyball until I read your post. I did not know that women wore bikinis for volleyball. I guess I sort of imagined them wearing a tennis type of outfit. Isn’t that what they wore in high school? I don’t remember bikinis.

    Well, down with the bikini uniform! We’ve come a long way, baby. Well, maybe not such a long way.

    What about a tankini? I favor those.

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